Define Your Own Success

Participating in any kind of challenge has pros and cons. Are you competitive enough to be inspired by others’ progress, or will their success discourage you? Do you create goals for yourself that you have a shot at, or are your goals too lofty so they lead only to failure?

November was to be a month of challenges for me. First there was NaNoWriMo. I found last year that I am physically and mentally capable of writing 50,000 or more words in a novel in one month. This year, however, I had to make some choices about how I spent my time. It was difficult, but I decided against the hard-core approach so I could finish some other pressing projects. What I did do was to modify my goal to “write on my novel every day” because I haven’t done that in months. I won’t make it to the 50,000 word NaNo goal, but it looks like I will succeed with my modified goal.

My second goal for November was more like a culmination – my husband and I were to run our first half marathon in Pasadena, CA, on November 16. Unfortunately, fires in nearby towns worsened the night before and the marathon was called off due to extremely poor air quality. I ache for those who lost everything they owned, I really do. But it doesn’t make us any less disappointed. Regardless of the reason, we did not make our goal. So we have to modify this one, too. We will probably run a different half marathon in February. (In a silly side note, we decided today that overeating during the Thanksgiving weekend will likely spur us into action and back into training on Monday morning. I don’t usually like using guilt as a motivator, but in this case, it will be fun to overindulge enough to get to that point!)

It has taken me a long time to learn that it’s natural and healthy to adjust your goals as necessary. Part of that learning curve came through years of doing the same thing over and over – creating lofty goals I couldn’t reach, then beating myself up with guilt over the failures – and expecting that one day I would eventually succeed. You’ve heard this before – doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results is a sign of insanity!

In my experience, you are the only person who can create healthy, sometimes challenging goals for yourself. I’m the only one who can figure out what healthy, sometimes challenging goals are best for me. But together we can encourage each other in our goals, help pick each other up when we fall, and offer each other advice on making the goals more achievable.

So tell me – what kinds of successes are you having now? What kinds of goals are you making or modifying for the future? What are you doing to actively see yourself as a success? Because that’s part of how you’ll become one.